An Old Friend
by Oliveydoughnuts
Summary: When doing the bidding of a magician Bartimaeus runs into an old friend, a sardonic female demon, romance follows. One shot or series depending on review amount, and contents.


**I'm not proud of this but it's my best take on a romantic Bartimaeus tale, enjoy. (Bartimaeus/ Other Character)**

**An Old Friend**

I crept slowly and cautiously along the pavement assessing my task: The walls were high, I could already see that. I might try to bridge them as a bird... but somehow it seemed too easy; fate had a strange sense of humour. However, it would have been stupid not to try so with a quick spell and a flick of my sparrow's wings, I was in the air circling the massive building below me. I saw at once the flaw in my current guise; searchlights swung their powerful beams across the night. If I got in their way, it would set off an alarm and although no one was likely to suspect a sparrow, it would have been unwise to put anyone on alert. Oh well, if it couldn't be over it would have to be under.

Finding the softest bit of grass on the kerb only took a matter of seconds and, becoming a mole, I began to dig. Had I been an ordinary_ Scapanus Orarius_, it would have taken me at least an hour and I would surely have been noticed, but this fearsome little creature had larger paws and abnormally shaped claws, making it distinctive from its kind and more importantly, a much faster digger. I had never been a mole before and I certainly didn't seem to have missed much. I was caked with mud, I kept on bumping into worms and I banged my head on a pebble five times, so I was glad when my little pink nose broke the surface of an immaculate tulip bed that surrounded the house. Searchlights and flowers: strange combination. I morphed into a squirrel, one of my preferred forms and skittered forward a few feet. I was planning to then change into a bird and check the higher floors for a way in, when I noticed something moving to my left. I spun around.

Later I would tell myself that the squirrel really had been a stupid idea, but how would I have known there would be Dobermans? My rodent's instincts took control and I shot off round the corner, the ravenous mutts in hot pursuit. Squirrels are pretty fast, but they're sprinters not long distance runners and I was getting tired. I couldn't become a bird, they'd be on me before I could take off, and I wouldn't be able to fight back, and definitely not a fly (ever tried escaping from something when you have a hundred eyes? Believe me, it's difficult). A ground animal then, think… The dogs sped towards me then scraped to a halt; the two-ton bear in front of them was a little disconcerting. It turned its head and drew itself up to its full impressive height. Letting out a deafening roar it lunged at them and they ran for their lives, tails between their legs. An alarm went off somewhere and suddenly the courtyard was alive with men's voices. A guard hurried round the side of the building where the bear had been but all he saw was a crow gliding up to the roof.

None of the windows were open; I checked thoroughly. Eventually I went to the chimney and gazed down its cowled throat. The slits in between the bars were small, too small for a man, a crow, even, but just right for an innocent little spider!

I was down in the room in a flash; I gazed around with my eight eyes and sidled up to the door opposite me. I tried it – locked! That was a good sign. Grinning I spun around on my new human heel and proceeded to turn the room upside-down. Finally I came to a book case and removing a manuscript called _"The Spider's Stratagem"_,pulled out a large metal box from a dent in the wall. Changing into a gorilla I braced my enhanced muscles and felt the padlock give way. An object dropped into my waiting palm. I stared at it. The largest cut diamond in the world… I was about to shove it into my miraculously materialized pocket and scram when a silver bar was thrust in front of me. I gasped and staggered back; pivoting desperately to come face to face with the most beautiful djinnie I had ever laid eyes upon. She was grasping the weapon gingerly by its lengthy wooden handle, "Tut Tut Bartimaeus," she purred with a voice like milk, "You've gone down market! Working for that Paul Mirrod!"

I shuddered at the name, "Down market isn't quite the word!" I quipped. She permitted herself a smile, well her muzzle crinkled slightly, and in that instant I recognised her, "Lydia Winters?" I gasped, "I thought you were dead!"

She examined her delicate, elongated claws in a show of indifference, "Surely you know me better than that? I never quite got the hang of dying!"

I choked out a slightly humourless laugh, "I should have remembered that, do you recollect that time we were facing a pair of Madrids and you morphed into their master on all seven plains and they couldn't tell which was which?"

She nodded slowly, then and absently dropping the silver rod, turned into an Egyptian princess and glided over to me "I really missed you Bartimaeus!" She remarked. I grinned wickedly and becoming a certain tall, dark magician, bent forward and kissed her. In that moment as we lent against each other everything stopped, all of the pain of physical entrapment floated away and nothing was left but me and her. As she drew back I whispered into her ear; "This is a cliché of the highest order, although I have to say a very enjoyable one!"

**So what do you think? Sorry about any grammatical errors in later sections. And yes I know the last line is crap, but I couldn't think of anything wittier. R&R please?**


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